How to give a great blowjob: techniques and tips
How do you give a good blowjob? Certain areas deserve particular attention, and a few basic movements can build arousal. Simple skills let you bring his orgasm closer or hold it back, shaping the pleasure as you go.
The ground rules
A few basic rules help make oral sex enjoyable and avoid leaving either partner dissatisfied.
- It is voluntary. Either person can stop at any time. Pressure and persuasion have no place here.
- Make the pleasure mutual. There are not that many nerve endings in the mouth, and giving a blowjob is not always pleasurable. Caress the person giving it rather than simply enjoying the attention.
- Know when to move on. Giving a blowjob for a long time can be tiring. If orgasm is not happening, find another way to finish rather than dragging things out.
- Be honest. Talk about anything that is not working or that either of you dislikes. A conversation during or after sex helps you understand each other and build trust.
- Think about protection. Many infections can be passed on during oral sex. Protection is important with someone you do not know well. A condom is recommended for a blowjob; a pleasantly scented one is ideal.
Learning techniques is only part of it. The way you approach the experience matters just as much.
Getting started
Men become aroused quickly and do not need long foreplay, so going straight to taking the penis into your mouth is a common, all-purpose approach. But you can also take time to tease him.
Work your way down gradually, kissing other parts of his body. Move from his lips to his neck, chest and stomach, then his thighs, before reaching his genitals. Linger for a few seconds on each sensitive spot to draw out the anticipation.
When your mouth reaches his penis, do not immediately start sucking. Explore it with your lips and tongue first. As you discover the sensitive areas, he will be waiting for stronger stimulation and becoming more excited.
Tips for a better blowjob
Keep a few simple ideas in mind to make it enjoyable.
- Plenty of moisture. Smooth movement needs lubrication. Saliva is often used; moisten the whole penis so it is slippery. If that is not enough, lube helps the movements glide.
- Keep teeth out of the way. Contact should be smooth. Cover your teeth with your lips. Few people enjoy squeezing or biting, and it can cause injury, so it is best avoided.
- Practice. Giving a blowjob takes skill, including overcoming the gag reflex. Practising with a dildo can help. Two to four weeks of practice can teach even deepthroating. Early attempts may bring on gagging, and it is better not to let him see that.
- Use your hands. You do not have to do everything with your mouth. Your hands let you stimulate several areas at once.
Learn a few techniques and alternate between them.
The basic movements
Most techniques combine a small number of movements. Varying and combining them with the right rhythm is the foundation.
- Kissing: wet or dry, barely there or lingering. Kisses work on any area.
- Suction: controlling the pressure inside your mouth is one of the secrets of a good blowjob. Suction is something only your mouth can create, making it an important part of the experience.
- Tongue movements: relaxed or firm, focused on a small point or covering a wider area. More flexibility gives you more possibilities.
- Hand massage: brings more sensitive areas into play and intensifies the sensation.
Practise movements separately, then learn to combine them.
Blowjob techniques
The simple O technique
Make an O with your lips, keeping your teeth behind them. Move your lips up and down the shaft, with the penis resting against your tongue or palate. With enough moisture, these movements feel very pleasurable.
You can vary the pressure in your mouth. Draw in air as your head moves up, then breathe in as it moves down. That vacuum-like effect adds intensity.
Your hands can join in. Because the penis is not fully inside your mouth, stroke the remaining shaft and the scrotum. Move your hands in the same direction as your head or the opposite one. For example, move your head up with gentle suction as your hands move down, slightly stretching the penis.
A tip for this technique:
Keep a steady rhythm, especially as he gets close to finishing. Stops and pauses reduce arousal and make reaching orgasm harder.
The ice-lolly technique
This teasing technique works well at the beginning. Keep your tongue soft and lick from the scrotum up the penis, as if licking an ice lolly. Do not spend too long on it, but try to touch each area.
Vary your speed. With a flavoured lube, it can feel rather like enjoying dessert. Sound adds sensuality too: aim for soft lip sounds or moans rather than noisy slurping.
Make the most of it:
This technique is visually appealing, so give him a chance to watch. Choose a position that leaves the view open.
Butterfly wings
Here the tongue stays firm and moves quickly. Touch and lift it rapidly, like an insect beating its wings. The penis can be in your mouth or near your face. Focus on the head, the frenulum and the rim around the head.
Move your tongue up and down or side to side. Keeping this going takes stamina; switch techniques when you get tired.
A useful variation:
Use more than the tip of your tongue. Its underside and sides can work too, and sometimes feel easier.
Deepthroating
This is a demanding technique in which the whole penis goes inside. Your tongue and throat need to line up, which means tilting your head back.
Insertion triggers the gag reflex, which is overcome through practice. If gagging starts, trying to yawn helps relax the muscles.
Swallowing with the penis in your throat is considered an advanced skill and creates new sensations. A âroyal blowjobâ means being able to lick the testicles while deepthroating as well.
Learning the technique:
Relaxing oral gels and lubricants can help make the technique easier. Practice is still needed to avoid surprises.
How to finish
A good blowjob ends in orgasm and ejaculation. Whether to swallow is the woman's decision. Taking semen towards the back of the tongue makes its taste less noticeable.
If you do not want to swallow, it can go on the face, body or into your hands. Keeping a tissue nearby can help avoid a mess.
Questions about giving blowjobs
Why does semen make me feel sick?
Semen has a distinctive smell and taste that can bring up unpleasant associations. That is normal. You can choose not to swallow it and keep the experience comfortable.
How do I tell him I do not like giving blowjobs?
An honest conversation helps. Sex is voluntary, with no room for coercion. You do not even owe an explanation for saying no. Talk about it so that he does not keep suggesting the same thing repeatedly.
I give blowjobs for his pleasure, not mine. How do I learn to enjoy them?
Adult films promote the stereotype that women love giving blowjobs. But without stimulation of her own, a woman may only feel the emotional pleasure of his response. âLearning to love itâ can be difficult, and the claim itself is often misleading.
Add stimulation you enjoy. Have him touch your breasts or the area between your legs, or do something else that turns you on. Try a vibrator or the 69 position so that you both experience pleasure.