What does safer anal sex look like?

Comfortable, free from injury and wanted by both of you. I have put together this guide to help make a new experiment comfortable for you both.

Rule one: always use a condom. Remember that bacteria and viruses can be transmitted through the lining of the rectum.

Rule two: always use silicone-based lubricant. It stays slippery for longer and reduces the risk of injuring the anus. Some sex coaches recommend numbing lubricants, but I do not. Masking pain means you cannot hear your body's warning signals and may end up injured.

Rule three: anal sex should never hurt. If pain occurs, tell your partner to stop immediately and do not continue the experiment.

Rule four: prepare physically and mentally. You can use an anal douche: a small rubber bulb available at a pharmacy. Fill it with warm water and gently direct the water inside. Talk to your partner about foreplay too. They can begin by gently stroking the sphincter and stimulating the clitoris, then use one finger to work on the sphincter and prepare it for penetration.

Rule five: choose a safe position. The most comfortable one is lying on your side with your knees drawn towards your chest, in a fetal position. Your partner lies on their side behind you. This position lets you control his movements, and the angle of penetration is less likely to cause injury.

And remember the main rule: do not alternate between anal and vaginal sex.

Please do not force yourself. If you do not feel mentally ready, have fears, medical contraindications or pain, do not have anal sex. Only a very small percentage of women genuinely enjoy it; most endure it to please a man. Do not hurt yourself.